New here - suffer from servere anxiety triggered by MJ

[VictoryRider]

Thanks for the calming words @ThePiper. Sounds weird, but it means a lot that you guys on the internet are telling me that things will be OK.

@VictoryRider Well, from what you are saying I think I can already feel progress in that sense. The last month, I've actually been able to enjoy things and be a funny guy (a couple of times), just the way I did it prior to this experience. This tells me that I am still the very same person - maybe I'm actually a more wise person. "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger" - such a cliché, but it gives me hope!

I'm going to drink kava for the very first time now. I bought some medium grind Mahakea and Nene from GHK.
I've read about RT - because of this I don't think I'm supposed to be expecting something my first time?

See, it's working already! That's what I'm talking about. Glad to hear it.

RT: I had plenty of RT. Took 3 or 4 sessions before I really felt it. Then when it did finally kick in, ahhhhhhhh.
So, YMMV.

 

[Steve Mariotti]

@Damer, I came to kava after a few years of MJ-induced anxiety precipitating probably the worst depression of my life. I recognized in therapy that anxiety is the pump that inflates my depression and that reducing anxiety was an avenue that I'd not directly taken in my long and arduous journey with anti-depressants and adjunct medications. Some of the adjunct medications gave me dissociation, some gave flattened my affect completely, and some threw me into flights of sub-psychotic rage. I'd given up on adjuncts completely after 10 years of putting myself and my family through a rollercoaster. And then I found kava.

Kava helps with the anxiety to be sure. Whether it's effective at treating my depression is a separate matter, and the jury is still out. In the last month, during continued kava use, my depression has returned in force. There are always multiple variables in play and it's difficult to pull threads with respect to kava, so I'm continuing to experiment and observe and hold on---as that's really the best that I can do.

Kava has, however, given me a great tool to combat social anxiety and it continues to make me more social, effective in social situations, and less ruminative and self-critical afterwards, which is a huge win. The overall depressive trajectory has changed to some degree, but environmental factors like life situation and behavioral factors such as exercise also play key roles in keeping the depression at bay. I continue to wrestle with these factors, in spite of kava.

Good luck to you. I believe you'll find relief with kava. Please keep us posted on how it goes.

 

[Damer]

@Damer, I came to kava after a few years of MJ-induced anxiety precipitating probably the worst depression of my life. I recognized in therapy that anxiety is the pump that inflates my depression and that reducing anxiety was an avenue that I'd not directly taken in my long and arduous journey with anti-depressants and adjunct medications. Some of the adjunct medications gave me dissociation, some gave flattened my affect completely, and some threw me into flights of sub-psychotic rage. I'd given up on adjuncts completely after 10 years of putting myself and my family through a rollercoaster. And then I found kava.

Kava helps with the anxiety to be sure. Whether it's effective at treating my depression is a separate matter, and the jury is still out. In the last month, during continued kava use, my depression has returned in force. There are always multiple variables in play and it's difficult to pull threads with respect to kava, so I'm continuing to experiment and observe and hold on---as that's really the best that I can do.

Kava has, however, given me a great tool to combat social anxiety and it continues to make me more social, effective in social situations, and less ruminative and self-critical afterwards, which is a huge win. The overall depressive trajectory has changed to some degree, but environmental factors like life situation and behavioral factors such as exercise also play key roles in keeping the depression at bay. I continue to wrestle with these factors, in spite of kava.

Good luck to you. I believe you'll find relief with kava. Please keep us posted on how it goes.

Hi @Steve Mariotti, thank you for posting.
I surely hope for you that continous kava-use will help your depression. I don't think I have suffered from depression, but I've been really in doubt about this. Because when I am anxious, I think I feel pretty damn depressed - but 5 mins after, If I do something else that removes my anxiety, everything seems normal again - this has been really weird for me.
I've read that long-term kava use can cure depressions.

Anyways, I drank kava yesterday with allright results. Numbness was pretty easy to feel in my mouth, and I think i could feel a little "buzzy" feeling. I slept pretty good this night. But I wonder if it is just placebo? I didn't feel like, really sedated and "crunk" that I see some of you feel it.

 

[ThePiper]

Give it time. I only get krunk maybe one out of 5 or 6 attempts, and it's unpredictable. You can increase your chances of getting strong effects by having your kava on an empty stomach. Mahakea is one of my favorites. The anti-anxiety effects are most noticable when you're feeling the anxiety already. It provides quick relief, though it may sometimes take more than one shell. GHK kava doesn't sedate eme at all, nor does most hawaiian kava. If you want something sedating look to vanuatu kava.

 

[Pacifico]

Give it time. I only get krunk maybe one out of 5 or 6 attempts, and it's unpredictable. You can increase your chances of getting strong effects by having your kava on an empty stomach. Mahakea is one of my favorites. The anti-anxiety effects are most noticable when you're feeling the anxiety already. It provides quick relief, though it may sometimes take more than one shell. GHK kava doesn't sedate eme at all, nor does most hawaiian kava. If you want something sedating look to vanuatu kava.

Thats odd. GHK Nene sedates me. I can't even describe its effect because it's puts me out and away for the night. This afternoon I did papa kea and went straight to bed for three hours. Trying to wake up as we type and decide if I need any more kava tonight.

 

[Steve Mariotti]

GHK Nene is the Sleepmaker. And not in a sedated way, in a placid feeling of carefree relaxation that carries me off to bed on a cloud of peace.

 

[Pacifico]

I call it the Nenestesiologist. Count to ten if you can. I actually won't get any more of it as I am scared of the dependency issues I could have with it. It's impressive, that's for sure.

 

[Steve Mariotti]

I'd be shocked if you developed dependency on it. It took me a long time to get through my bag, as I only went to it when the mood struck. It never failed to deliver, however.

 

[Pacifico]

Personal, not clinical. Early on in college, I had to have a shot of liquor before bed.

 

[verticity]

I call it the Nenestesiologist. Count to ten if you can. I actually won't get any more of it as I am scared of the dependency issues I could have with it. It's impressive, that's for sure.

I wouldn't worry about that. I really is non addictive. (It may be habit forming, though, as may be all good things) And preferable to alcohol or sleeping pills for sure.

 

[Pacifico]

I wouldn't worry about that. I really is non addictive. (It may be habit forming, though, as may be all good things) And preferable to alcohol or sleeping pills for sure.

Yes, habit forming as opposed to addiction in a clinical sense. Kava is better for you than alcohol and barbiturates, but not better for you than melatonin. Melatonin is also cheap. Nene is an impressive sleep aid. Michael Jackson would still be alive had he known about it. I have been on melatonin for about seven or eight years now probably one or two troublesome nights per year and zero morning effects. If I didn't know about melatonin and I was still drinking two vodka tonics with a Tylenol PM, I would be thrilled about nene.

 

[Sadie]

I was addicted to MJ many years ago and I mean addicted. Tolerance just builds and builds and I was using it for anxiety and insomnia. I drank booze too but MJ was my drug of choice. 18 clean years later, Recovery and therapy have left me in a place where I understand the underlying reasons I was using to escape many things internally. You may have had anxiety and this was triggered by your MJ experience - in that sense it may be the silver lining - you're now in a place where you recognise something isn't right and it sounds like you're really searching for the answers so good on you. When I smoked MJ it was a very different strength than today's MJ. Thankfully you only did it a few times and knew to look after yourself and stop - well done for that. I would be careful with Benzo's, they can be dangerous and also addictive. I found Kava a few months ago and I've played around with different types, read lots on this forum and am still finding my way but it works, it really does. The best thing about it for me is the lack of physical addiction, it can be psychologically addictive but there is no physical withdrawal - I've had several week long breaks and missed it but had no anxiety or sleep problems. I started using it for pain relief but it has given me so much more. I read your post and I really felt for where you are - it sounds so scary but you rejected that feeling and didn't go back to it. I think Kava would help I really do. Someone else mentioned you might want to think about changing your therapist and I know this can be difficult as you've probably told your story and don't want to start again but as a trained therapist myself I would agree that you may want to think about whether the therapist you're seeing is the right one for you - if you're feeling not heard or misunderstood you can either tell them and work it out or change - your peace of mind is too important to waste time on someone who doesn't get you. Anyway I think you've made a great start coming on here and being so honest and articulate about where you are, you'll find lots of really nice people here so welcome and let us know how it goes.

 

[verticity]

Yes, habit forming as opposed to addiction in a clinical sense. Kava is better for you than alcohol and barbiturates, but not better for you than melatonin. Melatonin is also cheap. Nene is an impressive sleep aid. Michael Jackson would still be alive had he known about it. I have been on melatonin for about seven or eight years now probably one or two troublesome nights per year and zero morning effects. If I didn't know about melatonin and I was still drinking two vodka tonics with a Tylenol PM, I would be thrilled about nene.

Melatonin is an excellent and very safe sleep aid. But not as much fun as kava lol

 

[Pacifico]

Melatonin is an excellent and very safe sleep aid. But not as much fun as kava lol

You're right. For me, nene for sleeping is like washing my car with a firehouse, which would be fun if the mirrors stayed on.

 

[Steve Mariotti]

Melatonin is an excellent and very safe sleep aid. But not as much fun as kava lol

Melatonin isn't a sure thing though. It's about 50/50 for people. It has no effect on me whatsoever, but for those who are helped by it, I'm jealous. Consider yourselves lucky. If I need knock-out-drops for a once in a blue moon bout of insomnia, I still take diphenhydramine hcl (benadryl) for one night. Some grogginess the next morning, but it works for isolated cases. Tolerance builds really fast with that, and after a few consecutive days it's been shown as no more effective than placebo.

Nene, however, works.

 

[Sadie]

I found Nene didn't really do much for me - goes to prove the fact that we are all individual when it comes to Kava.... I found Kaolik really worked for me but maybe I need something really heavy don't know .... still starting on the journey so who knows what the future holds. I've heard of Melatonin but I don't really know what it is and I don't take OTC meds if I can help it. Kava has really changed my mind about natural remedies ... before I really looked down my nose at them!

 

[Pacifico]

Melatonin isn't a sure thing though. It's about 50/50 for people. It has no effect on me whatsoever, but for those who are helped by it, I'm jealous. Consider yourselves lucky. If I need knock-out-drops for a once in a blue moon bout of insomnia, I still take diphenhydramine hcl (benadryl) for one night. Some grogginess the next morning, but it works for isolated cases. Tolerance builds really fast with that, and after a few consecutive days it's been shown as no more effective than placebo.

Nene, however, works.

Melatonin isn't a sure thing but it's my sure thing, not to mention that I can smuggle it into Australia this summer. I take 10-20mgs of it and order it from Puritan. It it didn't work, I would now use nene.

 

[Sadie]

Thanks Pacifico. I've googled and I believe it's illegal in the UK - what's new

 

[Pacifico]

Thanks Pacifico. I've googled and I believe it's illegal in the UK - what's new

It is illegal for the chemist to sell. You can order from Puritan or Swanson for personal use. I am sure there are shipping costs but it's cheap in the first place.

 

[Sadie]

Thanks. I don't think I'll bother at this time as only sold in the US from what I can see .... Customs are like proper strict here. Kava helps me sleep so I'll stick with that for now